MB-Eish Part 5: 29

**"Eish" is a South African slang term expressing surprise, dismay, anger or frustration.** 

As I mentioned two years ago, I have joined the droves of engineers who have sold out to the dark side: Banking (and more recently, the elite league of the dark side: Asset Management). To make myself more comfortable in my new, murky surrounds I have decided to do an MBA part-time. This is the fifth in a series of posts about my MBA experience.

There are 29 days left until this MBA is over. This week I handed in my last assignment and all that's left is half a thesis. 15000 words stand between me and getting my life back. For the next 29 days this is going to take over my mind and my life and I am planning to blog every day until it's over. 

I hear the non-believers laughing. 

My track record is not flawless, but my intentions are solid. Guaranteed I am going to be grumpy as all hell and melodramatic aplenty, so remember if you can't handle it click here and stay there.

So today I have two confessions to make.

1. I am a bit of a nerd. 

(Not a surprise to some of you and not to be confused with a geek as I know nothing about gadgets or computer stuff - hard or soft.)


I was that girl at high school who took all the academic awards and was top of the class. But I tried to dedicate as little time to nerdiness as possible as I also quite enjoy lying around and watching tv. To this end I would do homework for one class in someone else's class, during lunch or on the bus to and from school; anywhere but at home. I got by quite nicely this way with a few late nights here and there. 

Cut to varsity. 

I'm studying chemical engineering and suddenly I can no longer do well with minimal effort and multi-tasking. Instead of manning up and putting more effort into studying organic chemistry and the like, I invested time into studying the curve of my boyfriend's bottom lip.  (Maybe not such a bad move as we're still together and some of our best memories were made then, but not so healthy for my inner nerd.) I still passed within four years, which apparently is an achievement in and of itself. But I had secretly hoped to be on the dean's list and get my degree with honours. I graduated feeling defeated and unintelligent. Falling short of those ambitions still haunts me. 

Cut to MBA.

The nerd is back trying to make up for the past. I am totally trying to seek penance for academic sins of yesteryear. Which brings me to the next confession.

2. I want to graduate with a distinction. 

(Again, not a surprise to some of you)

There I said it. I am nearly thirty and it still matters to me that I get good marks. Yes, some people will have it that good marks don't mean that you're smart. But getting bad marks sure makes me feel dumb! So I have put in effort, sacrificed nights of  fantastic tv, neglected my man, friends and family whenever deadlines drew near...and now, with 29 days to go..

I DON'T WANNA DO IT ANYMORE!! 

I am so over this! I want to enjoy the summer nights in Cape Town! I want to spend hours pinning pictures to my Pinterest wedding board! I want to sleep for eight hours at night! I want to have date nights with my guy!

But two years down the line, hours of work invested in a good GPA and I guess the choice is obvious. Painful, but obvious.

29 and counting. *sigh*